I'm not Going Under

Sometimes I need to be reminded that God is the potter and I am the clay. Although I am pretty sure that the clay never starts trying to be the potter in the pottery world – but I try to be God all the time.

During my 24 (almost) years of life, God has ALWAYS been faithful and I have no complaints. Sure, things don’t always never go as I plan, but I have watched his plans come to reality and they are always better than mine. I say all this to make the point that I have no reason to doubt God. In my heart I don’t want to doubt him.

However, recently I have been consumed with worries. I worry about some heath issues, I worry about job security, about my relationship with John, about our future plans.

Yesterday these worries impacted me in a physical way and I felt like my heart was heavy – like I could barely breathe.

I spent hours reading the word and praying that God would help me have faith….that he would help me with my unbelief. I prayed that He would help me be more like him – steadfast.

Well, the Jejovah-Jireh - the provider – brought me a message from a program called Walk in the Word that spoke to the fears that I am going through. In this message, pastor James MacDonald said:

“God knows you better than you know yourself. You're not going to lose it; you're going to be okay.
You don't know what you are capable of when you're resting in God's strength and not your own.
You're going to get through this one way or another. It's not going to last forever and you will get through it - because God is faithful. He's not tired and He's not wondering when this is going to be over.

Reassure yourself, "I'm not going under." You can keep going for another day, another week because God is producing staying power in you. The ability to remain in that marriage - as hard as it is. The ability to remain in that job - as hard as it is. The ability to stick with it in that difficult circumstance - no matter what.
If God can produce in you that staying power, He can give you everything else.

The good's not coming if you quit. Listen, God can get every characteristic of Christ into your life if He can just teach you to stay in the game.”

I want to stay in the game! I want to walk on water and be able to keep my eyes on Jesus – for if I don’t I start to sink. I want to trust God with all my heart.

None of this is easy, but I want it. In the mean time I will keep reminding myself that I'm not going under.