I Understand the Feeling!

Being Authentic

I feel embarrassed to confess this, but I can be a very judgmental person in some situations. I have noticed that it is easier for me to become judgmental when I allow Satan to plant seeds of jealousy in my heart. Being aware of my own weaknesses has allowed me to work on very specific areas of my heart. It has also helped me seek God’s forgiveness and guiding when I notice these sins creeping into my life. But I also get discouraged when I notice myself falling into the same sin again and again – it is the thorn on my side.


Lately, I have not felt satisfied with life. I feel busy, tired, pulled into ten different directions, etc. This kind of feeling (and attitude) leads me to look at the lives of some friends and become envious. You know, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Except, in my heart I don’t want to feel that way. I want to wake up in the morning and be thankful for the day the Lord has given me – knowing that He has prepared work for me to do that has eternal value. I want my life to make a difference in this world. I don’t want to live wishing things were different or better. I want to live an authentic life!


What is hard to believe is that I am the only thing stopping me from living that authentic life.


I need less of me and more of Jesus!

Love Story

Well, I have one CD in my car right now. I should say, I have one CD with one song in my car right now.

Do you want to guess what it is?

Well, I bet you didn’t expect it to be a CD with a Taylor swift song. Yup. Taylor Swift!

I sang "Love Story” all the way to work and back home today. I turned the volume really loud and sang at the top of my lungs. I pretty much felt like I was 16 years old again.

Now that I am home, I still have the song playing in my head.

…We were both young when I first saw you…

I think it is interesting that I like that even though I know the end of the true Romeo and Juliet story. There is nothing romantic about that end. They die - I should say, they commit suicide!  I also happen to know what romantic relationships are like – and there is a lot more to it than a ring and a white dress.

I have been married for almost three years and I am still learning what true love is. It is not perfect, it takes work, it is not always romantic, it requires an abundant amount of grace and it is definitely worth fighting for. My love story is nothing like what Swift’s song suggests - but it is real!

Oh, Monday

Mondays are always hard days for me.

It all starts when I say goodbye to John in the morning. We each get into a car and drive away in opposite direction.

Getting back into the routine of work takes time and I find myself wishing I had enough time to do everything I want to do.

Surprisingly, today went by faster than I realized. I left work and drove away, thinking of what I wanted to accomplish tonight. I got home and started the laundry, worked out, showered, ate dinner, edited some photos and talked to a dear friend.

People, I got a lot done tonight!

Oh, and I started exercising again!! It feels so good to be physically active – minus the soreness…

Today, I also spent a lot of time thinking about the future – and I tend to worry when I start thinking about the future. It is time to lay my worries at the foot of the cross, knowing that the Lord has perfect plans for me!

"I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

What is Forgiveness?

I receive weekly emails from Walk in the Word - and this week's topic is not an easy one. I wanted to share this post with you all because I believe I am not the only one that has a hard time forgiving others from time to time.


"Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony" - Colossians 3:12-14


Forgiveness is a decision. It's an act of will to release a person from the obligation that resulted when they injured you.


Unforgiveness sounds like this: "You owe me! I'm going to make you pay by hating you, by slandering you, by returning in kind, by recruiting other people to my bitterness. I'm holding this over you!"


Here's forgiveness: "You don't owe me. I'm not trying to get even. I'm not looking for a chance to pay you back. God didn't make me that way. I choose to forgive."


You say, "James, I can forgive today, but I know by Thursday I'll have that thing back on my back again." I understand that. Get this: forgiveness is a crisis and a process. The first thing you have to do is see your unforgiveness as sin. You have to acknowledge that God's not going to forgive you if you don't forgive others. You've got to have that crisis. You've got to stop explaining, defending, holding onto it, cherishing, and reviewing it. You've got to say, "I don't want this for my life."


The crisis means, "I choose to forgive. I'm letting it go." But the process means, when the painful matter comes into your mind again, you promise yourself to maintain the following process: "I won't bring it up to the person; I won't bring it up to other people;" and most hard by far, "I won't bring it up to myself anymore."


Someone said to me, "James, I can't help myself. As soon as I see the person, Bam! My mind goes right to that thing." That's why forgiveness is a crisis and a process. In the crisis you decide, in the process you live it out.


Now, here's a key: When you fail in the process you have to return to the crisis. When you find yourself flashing back to unforgiveness, realize you failed in the process. You've got to return to the crisis. You've got to get before the Lord and say, "God, forgive me. I want to be a forgiving person and here I'm holding this again, Lord. Help me again. I commit afresh to let it go."


Crisis/process. Over time you'll let it go and you'll be a lot happier because of it.


By James MacDonald

Saturday

It has been a while since I’ve had a relaxing weekend. My previous Saturdays were filled with photography, photo editing, cleaning, cooking, running errands…and family visiting (but since I love spending time with family, I think the lack of quiet time is totally worth it!).

However, today was just perfect – and it is not even over yet.

John and I slept in…woke up…snuggled…and slept again. We had our traditional Saturday breakfast: toast and eggs with feta. We talked about our 3^rd anniversary (which is coming up in 4 months). We went grocery shopping, replaced the car’s headlight, made a trip to the post office, checked out some bikes (for me) and enjoyed the sunshine through the open sun roof!


We are currently baking Chicken Marbella, which smells heavenly and we’ll be joining some friends for a game night soon.


I hope that you too get a chance to relax this weekend. Read a book, take a nap, talk to a friend or spend some time talking to the Father. Slow down and take a deep breath before Monday comes along.


Happy Saturday!

Hope for Japan

In the last post I mentioned that I have been thinking a lot about Japan and the people who survived the earthquake and tsunami. Well, I am not the only one thinking of Japan these days.

I want to introduce you to Ella, a six year old girl who decided to do something to help the people of Japan.
If you would like to help Ella help others, please visit her website for more information.


***I work with Ella's mom and I am very proud of the way these two ladies are being intentional about making a difference in the lives of those who need it the most!