You Have Called Me Higher

This song has been on my lips all day and the more I sing it the more I want to declare to the Lord that I will be his for all my life. He has called me and I will go where he will lead me. 

All Sons & Daughters - You Have Called Me Higher Lyrics

I could just sit

I could just sit and wait for all your goodness

Hope to feel your presence

And I could just stay

I could just stay right where I am and hope to feel you

Hope to feel something again

And I could hold on

I could hold on to who I am and never let You change me from the inside

And I could be safe

I could be safe here in Your arms and never leave home

Never let these walls down

But you have called me higher

You have called me deeper

And I will go where you will lead me Lord

You have called me higher

You have called me deeper

And I will go where you lead me Lord

Where you lead me

Where you lead me Lord

And I will be Yours

I will be Yours for all my life

So let Your mercy light the path before me

I Won't Give Up

I have been praying, thinking and reading a lot about marriage lately. Over the past few years, I  have seen many friends get married, others end their marriage and some work as hard as they can to make it work.

I am convinced that marriage is one of the hardest gifts God has given us and yet it can be so pure and beautiful. I will probably be sharing more about what I have been learning as a wife - but today, I wanted to share a song that caught my attention lately.

A few weeks ago I was home late at night while John was at a Bible Study. I was listening to a Pandora station, editing a few photo sessions when the song "I Won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz came on.

Those words stuck to me because I struggle with perseverance when things are hard. It is just so much easier to give up than it is to fight through different circumstances and become stronger and wiser. But I believe that God did not create me to be a quitter. The first Bible verse I ever memorized as a child was Philippians 4:13 - "I can so all things though Him who gives me strength."

I don't want to give up when things get hard. I want to persevere in all areas of life and know that I did my very best and relied on God's strength and not my own.

"I Won't Give Up"
By Jason Mraz

When I look into your eyes
It's like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise
Well, there's so much they hold
And just like them old stars
I see that you've come so far
To be right where you are
How old is your soul?

Well, I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

And when you're needing your space
To do some navigating
I'll be here patiently waiting
To see what you find

'Cause even the stars they burn
Some even fall to the earth
We've got a lot to learn
God knows we're worth it
No, I won't give up

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stake
And in the end, you're still my friend at least we did intend
For us to work we didn't break, we didn't burn
We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up, still looking up.

Well, I won't give up on us (no I'm not giving up)
God knows I'm tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
We've got a lot to learn (we're alive, we are loved)
God knows we're worth it (and we're worth it)

I won't give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up

Here I Go Again

I have spent a lot of time these past few weeks preparing for birth, postpartum, parenthood...but I recently have been hearing the Spirit whispering, reminding me to not forget my first love.

As I stop to listen to those whispers, I pray for those who come to mind, I praise God for His unfailing love, I ask for direction as I want to glorify Him with my life. Although parenthood is still around the corner, I am starting to see how distracting a child can be and how easy it could be to become so involved in my role as a parent that I forget to spend time with my Father in heaven and even ignore His call for my life.

While I believe that being the best parent I can be is part of God's call for me, I am convicted that being a parent is not the whole picture. My Spirit thirsts for me to encourage others while sharing about God's love and plan for each and every person. My hearts yearns for me to speak the words of life with fire in my eyes.

The song "Here I Go Again" by Casting Crowns, perfectly describes what has been in my heart today:

Beautiful

I see Your face in every sunrise

The colors of the morning are inside Your eyes

The world awakens in the light of the day

 I look up to the sky and say

You’re beautiful

  I see Your power in the moonlit night

 Where planets are in motion and galaxies are bright

We are amazed in the light of the stars

 It’s all proclaiming who You are

You’re beautiful, You're beautiful

  I see you there hanging on a tree

 You bled and then you died and then you rose again for me

 Now you are sitting on Your heavenly throne

Soon we will be coming home

You’re beautiful, you're beautiful

When we arrive at eternity’s shore

Where death is just a memory and tears are no more

We’ll enter in as the wedding bells ring

Your bride will come together and we’ll sing

You’re beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful

I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful

 I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful

 I see Your face, I see Your face

I see Your face, You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful

Forever Reign

I went to church last night and left with my heart full of joy and thanksgiving! I spend the day thinking of the song "Forever Reign" and I wanted to share it with you:




You are good, You are good

When there's nothing good in me

You are love, You are love

On display for all to see

You are light, You are light

When the darkness closes in

You are hope, You are hope

You have covered all my sin

You are peace, You are peace

When my fear is crippling

You are true, You are true

Even in my wandering

You are joy, You are joy

You're the reason that I sing

You are life, You are life,

In You death has lost its sting

Oh, I’m running to Your arms,

I’m running to Your arms

The riches of Your love

Will always be enough

Nothing compares to Your embrace

Light of the world forever reign

You are more, You are more

Than my words will ever say

You are Lord, You are Lord

All creation will proclaim

You are here, You are here

In Your presence I'm made whole

You are God, You are God

Of all else I'm letting go

Oh, I’m running to Your arms

I’m running to Your arms

The riches of Your love

Will always be enough

Nothing compares to Your embrace

Light of the world forever reign

My heart will sing

no other Name

Jesus, Jesus

Oh, I’m running to Your arms

I’m running to Your arms

The riches of Your love

Will always be enough

Nothing compares to Your embrace

Light of the world forever reign

Love Story

Well, I have one CD in my car right now. I should say, I have one CD with one song in my car right now.

Do you want to guess what it is?

Well, I bet you didn’t expect it to be a CD with a Taylor swift song. Yup. Taylor Swift!

I sang "Love Story” all the way to work and back home today. I turned the volume really loud and sang at the top of my lungs. I pretty much felt like I was 16 years old again.

Now that I am home, I still have the song playing in my head.

…We were both young when I first saw you…

I think it is interesting that I like that even though I know the end of the true Romeo and Juliet story. There is nothing romantic about that end. They die - I should say, they commit suicide!  I also happen to know what romantic relationships are like – and there is a lot more to it than a ring and a white dress.

I have been married for almost three years and I am still learning what true love is. It is not perfect, it takes work, it is not always romantic, it requires an abundant amount of grace and it is definitely worth fighting for. My love story is nothing like what Swift’s song suggests - but it is real!

A Hug From Jesus

Have you ever felt the need to be hugged and loved? I think pretty much every human being has experienced that need. I have that need multiple times a week and there is nothing better than to feel someone’s touch and to hear their voice proclaim that you are loved.

That is what I long for at this exact moment – and I am finding it very unfortunate that I am also alone.  There is no one here to hug me and tell me that I am loved. Although I KNOW that I am loved by many. But being alone right now feels very… lonely.

There are a lot of things going on in life that are crowding my brain. From experience, I can tell you that it is very hard to explain your feelings in a logical and clear manner when you have a crowded brain. However, trying to explain your feelings in a logical and clear manner when you have a crowded brain while talking on the phone - is just a recipe for disaster. Yup, that just happened to me.

I drove home today feeling somewhat bitter about being alone. I miss living life with another person. I miss being taken care of. I miss being part of a team and I feel like I am my only teammate at the moment – and I am not doing a very good job at being a teammate.

I drove home wanting a hug!

I tried to explain all these things (plus more) to John over the phone and instead of feeling loved, I said good night while feeling even more frustrated. Frustrated that I had to repeat everything I said because his only response was “what?” (Probably because I was not being clear). Frustrated that I have to tell him what I have been up to – because he isn’t living life with me. Frustrated that he couldn’t give me a hug!

As I sat on my bedroom floor (my phone was charging and I couldn’t unplug it from the wall while talking to John) quiet with the phone in my hand, I realized that at that very moment I had no one but Jesus – and I really wanted Him to give me a hug and tell me that He is here – tell me that I am not alone.

I was reminded of the song: None but Jesus

In the quiet, in the stillness
I know that You are God
In the secret of Your presence
I know there I am restored

When You call I won’t refuse
Each new day again I’ll choose

There is no one else for me
None but Jesus
Crucified to set me free
Now I live to bring Him praise

In the chaos, in confusion
I know You’re Sovereign still
In the moment of my weakness
You give me grace to do Your will

When You call I won’t delay
This my song through all my days

All my delight is in You Lord
All of my hope, all of my strength
All my delight is in You Lord Forevermore

I sang this song as the tears ran down my cheeks. I sang it with my heart and soul because I realized that in a way I have relied on John to be my source of love – but John is no Jesus and only Jesus can be the lover of my soul. Only Jesus promises never to leave; only Jesus can take away the loneliness and quiet the storm in me. I am very thankful that He is here with me!

I am Singing...

You Hold Me Now
(Hillsong)

On that day when I see
All that You have for me
When I see You face to face
There surrounded by Your grace

All my fear is swept away
In the light of your embrace
When Your love is all I need
And forever I am free

Where the streets are made of gold
In Your presence healed and whole
Let the songs of heaven rise to you alone

No weeping, no hurt or pain
No suffering You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness no sick or lame
No hiding You hold me now,
You hold me now

In this life I will stand
Through my joy and my pain
Knowing there's a greater day
There's a hope that never fails

When Your name is lifted high
And forever praises rise
For the glory of Your Name
I'm believing for the day

When the wars and violence cease
All creation lives in peace
Let the songs of heaven rise to you alone

No weeping, no hurt or pain
No suffering You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness, no sick or lame
No hiding You hold me now,
You hold me now

For eternity
All my heart will give
All the glory to Your name
(4x)

No weeping, no hurt or pain
No suffering You hold me now
You hold me now
No darkness no sick or lame
No hiding You hold me now,
You hold me now

(3x)

In Need of the Fire...

"On Fire"

They tell you where you need to go
They tell you when you'll need to leave
They tell you what you need to know
They tell you who you need to be

But everything inside you knows
There's more than what you've heard
There's so much more than empty conversations
Filled with empty words

And you're on fire
When He's near you
You're on fire
When He speaks
You're on fire
Burning at these mysteries

Give me one more time around
Give me one more chance to see
Give me everything You are
Give me one more chance to be... (near You)

Cause everything inside me looks like
Everything I hate
You are the hope I have for change
You are the only chance I'll take

When I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
These mysteries...

I'm standing on the edge of me
I'm standing on the edge of everything I've never been before.
And i've been standing on the edge of me
Standing on the edge

And I'm on fire
When You're near me
I'm on fire
When You speak
(Yea) I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries... these mysteries... these mysteries
Ah you're the mystery
You're the mystery

Soul Birthday

On August 12th, 2001 - I gave my life to God and declared that Jesus Christ is the Son of God and Savior of my life!

I have never forgotten that day. That day marks a new beginning for me.

Trying to find words to tell the story of my spiritual life, I discovered a song that describes my relationship with Jesus to this day.


Before The Throne of God Above

Before the throne of God above
I have a strong and perfect plea.
A great high Priest whose Name is Love
Who ever lives and pleads for me.
My name is graven on His hands,
My name is written on His heart.
I know that while in Heaven He stands
No tongue can bid me thence depart.

When Satan tempts me to despair
And tells me of the guilt within,
Upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end of all my sin.
Because the sinless Savior died
My sinful soul is counted free.
For God the just is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me.

Behold Him there the risen Lamb,
My perfect spotless righteousness,
The great unchangeable I AM,
The King of glory and of grace,
One in Himself I cannot die.
My soul is purchased by His blood,
My life is hid with Christ on high,
With Christ my Savior and my God!

Praise God for his love, mercy, grace and patience!!